Archive for the ‘self confidence’ Category

Oh Woe is Me

Monday, June 8th, 2009

Woe is Me? Or Make Lemonade Out of Lemons. It’s our choice!

When times are tough, as with the current economic recession, it is always easy to give in to depression and constantly moan about the woes of life. There are just too many worries to constantly think about: bills to pay, family to care for, and so on. The problems never end. The fact is, they never do! As you make your journey through life, you will always encounter barriers and hurdles. These are trials meant to test your strength and improve your will. Rather than simply give up and cry your frustrations out, you may want to look around you and see that no one is exempt from problems.

Self pity may get you sympathy at first, but if this is a repetitive behavior, don’t be surprised if you lose friends along the way. When you’ve become the black hole for energy, people will avoid you like a plague. No one wants to be surrounded with sadness, and no one can take a whiner for too long a period. You have yet to meet the person who never struggles with frustration. This comes with the territory of being human. It is not wrong to be frustrated, but it is how we handle our frustration that counts.

One of the most effective ways to change how you react to negativity is to change how you see it and what you do about it. Self pity is a shortcut to the path of destruction. When you give in to depression, you are basically saying that you don’t have it in you to solve the problem. In fact, you are just aggravating the situation. You yell, curse, and cry, yet the problem still remains unsolved.

On the other hand, a more productive solution would be to view frustration is as a chance for improving your abilities to solve the problem. If you get frustrated, try to have an outlet. Go talk to a friend, visit a specialist, or pound that hammer away in your garage. You need to let it out and find a way to express your explosive emotions rather than keep it locked inside. If this is your constant practice, expect the dam to break sooner or later. Instead, ask yourself what the possible solutions are. The thing about self-pity is that if you can’t get others to feel sorry for you, you can always just feel sorry for yourself.

Pity parties are always a party of one because no one wants to be on the guest list. Just know that when you catch yourself in this state, you tend to lose perspective. You lose sight of the big picture and will be unable to spot the solution that may just be right under your nose. When you are too caught up in your problems, you’ll be too busy to even notice the faintest flicker of hope.

You must find ways to bounce back. Be the victor, not the victim. Life is a marathon, and your goal should be not to win it all the time. Instead, you need to focus on your running and learning not to quit. Instead of making excuses on your failure, you must learn to get back up and let your creative juices flow so that you can achieve what you want most. Have a worthwhile goal, one that deserves a spot in your loved ones’ minds. If your life were a book, let it fall under the inspirational category.

The Power of Self-Confidence

Saturday, June 6th, 2009

The Need for Self-Confidence

We all have hidden fears that we don’t always want to share with friends. These fears often leave us paralyzed. When the need to overcome these fears is required, we sometimes choose to take the easy way out: hide and run for cover.

In order to succeed in life, we first have to believe in ourselves. All this talk about finding ways to achieve success is pointless when we just don’t trust our own talents and abilities. Without self confidence, we won’t have the tools to face life’s challenges with equanimity. The dilemma we sometimes face is not knowing how to gain self confidence when we don’t really have it in us. Do we really have to experience success first before we believe in ourselves? Maybe, but then again, many set themselves up to be discouraged before they’ve even tried anything.

To make your goals more attainable, you can make it more manageable by breaking down your larger goal into smaller ones. The chances for success here then increase. Then, make sure that you celebrate each small feat that you overcome.

Self image is another important factor. If you constantly criticize yourself, you will never feel adequate. Remember, negativity begets negativity.  This low self image is sometimes the by-product of your life experiences as you face the devastating blows of your wrong choices. You need to realize that these mistakes will never hold you down as long as you don’t allow them to. You need to look at now, not yesterday! What have you learned from the blunder? Use this and let this serve as a guide as you continue on life’s path. And then there are people who also affect the way you look at yourself. The decision of whether or not spend some toxic time with these individuals is all up to you. Learn to put your foot down and seek out those who can be more helpful to your overall growth.

You need to see yourself as inherently worthy. Be aware of how unique you are and realize that you are more than capable of contributing to the good of the world. Pay attention to only those who want what’s best for you and turn a deaf ear to those who just want to see you go down. The ones that deserve your time are the ones who recognize your inner strength. Look at yourself in a more positive light and start to see what you are actually blessed with.

Your self image is intimately intertwined with your destiny. You have to guard you thoughts against feelings of inadequacy. The power of a positive vision should never be underestimated. This is what helped the most successful people on their way to the top. Rule of thumb states that the clearer the goal is, the higher your self confidence gets. Even the most capable mind and body need a good dose of self confidence. Only with trusting yourself and knowing what you are capable of will you ever be able to attain success.