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Create and Enjoy Spare Time for Yourself

Wednesday, May 27th, 2009

“What is spare time?”, you ask as you lurch from one task to another.

With the very busy world that we live in, it’s often hard to squeeze in some quality time for ourselves. Some people work hard and don’t get enough rest for months at a time. If you look at statistics, the number of breakdowns experienced by people continues to increase. Why? It’s simply because people have forgotten to take care of themselves. They work and take care of their duties thinking that they don’t need a break. They find that finishing a task is more imperative than giving themselves a moment’s breather. They continue to trudge through life, until one day, they simply collapse and lose control.

I’m all for hard work and determination. Success can only be attained if these two traits are present. But we also need to know when to say that enough is enough. Our minds need to rest, or else it can fail us when we most need it. In fact, universities recommend that students study ahead of time. Last minute cramming can lead to lack of sleep. On the day of the test, many of these students have had total mental blackouts, instances wherein everything they read about and studied for just leaves their mind. Everything has simply flown out the window, and everything they’ve worked for has become moot.

If there’s one way to enjoy life, it’s knowing the importance of rest. We do need to fulfill all our responsibilities. But we also need to learn how to enjoy life and bask in its unique moments, lest we forget what we’re really here for. We are all blessed with friends and family. If we don’t give ourselves enough time to spend with them, then we may as well watch all our relationships crumble. No one wants this to happen to them. While many do go on vacations with their loved ones, they also take their work with them. This simply isn’t quality time.

So, how do we actually get to enjoy our spare time? Here are a few tips to follow:

  • Inform everyone at work so that they will know not to bother you.
  • Finish what needs to be done and keep the pending items safe in a drawer.
  • Write down what you need to work on when you get back.
  • Know that your friends, family and loved ones are just as important as your work.
  • Give yourself time to reflect on your life and work out ways in which you can balance everything.
  • Keep yourself surrounded with friends during your spare time to lessen the chances of thinking about your responsibilities.
  • Learn how to organize your life.
  • Learn to ask for help when you have difficulty sorting something out.

The most important thing to know here is that we’re not alone. We have people we can count on, as long as we also know when to help a person in need. Your friends are there to help you rejuvenate your soul and keep you from breaking down. Life just seems less tough when you have someone to lean on. Remember, as we enjoy our spare time, we need not feel guilty. We simply are enjoying life and we are giving ourselves a chance to recharge and bring back the enthusiasm we have for work.

Good luck. Read the rest of my blog (in your spare time!!!)

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Finding a Moment to Relax

Tuesday, May 26th, 2009

If you follow a very busy schedule, as most people do, you sometimes just need to get away from it all. You’ll need time to recuperate and recharge whatever energy you’ve spent. As the world gets smaller, the demands placed on you ironically increases. This inversely proportional relationship is what can astound you. There may be days that you’ll feel unable to meet all the requirements and deadlines you have to fulfill. During these turbulent times, you’ll need to take a step back and take a moment’s breather.
 
To keep your sanity, you must have a crib sheet of helpful tips that will serve as your anchor. You definitely will need time away from it all, a place where no noise and phone calls can interrupt your quiet thoughts. Common sense dictates that you need to give your brain a chance to unwind. Strategies may differ, of course, because of varying interests. Some people prefer watching TV over reading, while others feel the need to keep their hands busy to help them relax.

If you are an avid reader, choose a book that gets you excited and enthusiastic. Self-help reads may come into play here. There are so many writers out there who are more than willing to share their ideas on how to relax. All you need to do is go to your nearest bookstore and purchase yourself a copy of one of these books. If, on the other hand, you enjoy daydreaming, then give yourself time to think of happy thoughts. Set a quota for yourself. A good suggestion would be to have at least three happy thoughts daily. You could think about your future plans or happy moments. Whatever it may be, just make sure that these get you to once again stand up and face the day with a smile on your face.

The most popular tactic that people employ nowadays is a massage. This is very much like meditating. These two things have been known to effectively relax the muscles in your body. So, after a late night’s work, drive yourself to a spa and ask for a full body massage. Get yourself in the zone by thinking about your dreams while someone soothes the kinks out of your muscles.

Some of you may find that doing all these is almost next to impossible, especially if you have a family to take care of. The trick here is to be resourceful. Try to create your own quiet spot in the house. Think about the best place for you. If you are creative enough, you’ll realize that there are hundreds of places you can think of. A drive to the store or picking a corner in the attic may be enough. The secret here is to plan ahead and choose a place where no one can invade it when you need that time alone. I personally find myself looking forward to a drive to the mall. Being alone in the car helps me think about the things I want to do while listening to my favorite tunes.

We all have a place we know as our own. The secret here is to be inventive. These spots, however simple they may be, can be our very own comfortable little nook where we can simply lock ourselves away from the world as we go into dreamland. This can be our very own dwelling, and no one else’s.

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Finding your Direction in Life

Monday, May 25th, 2009

Ever find yourself waking up one morning up full of zest and energy to pursue your life’s dreams and then realize six months later that you aren’t even one step closer to any of your goals? If you find yourself in this rut, then maybe it’s because you’ve been caught in a trap, the kind that is difficult to get out of. Where are you headed? You don’t know. Where have your dreams gone? On the back burner.

Most of us don’t know our direction in life. We live with so many dreams inside us but somehow we keep finding ourselves finding excuses to delay the pursuit of our goals. We offer up so many excuses: bills to pay, family to take care of, work to finish, etc. Too many excuses and too many delaying tactics. In the end, when we see that we haven’t accomplished much, we have no one to blame but us. We don’t want to live life this way. But then, who does?

We get off track time and again, as most people do. We get too caught up in life’s little hindrances that we forget to live in the moment, to enjoy the now! The reason for all the confusion may lie on the fact that our dreams are not as well-defined as we would want them to be. The problem here, therefore, is focus. We must have clarity of thought to know how we can accomplish what we want. We need a step-by-step plan that spells out what we have to do to get to the end. When we experience setbacks, we have to know how to deal with each of them. After all, nothing in life is perfect. There are just things that are way beyond our control, and if we live life going a step forward and then two steps back, we go further away from our dreams. The farther we go, the more impossible it will seem to get what we want.

It’s also important to acknowledge the situation we’re in. We all live in different environments and have different methods of coping with reality. The important thing is that we are in touch with the things that happen around us. Knowing how our surroundings affect us will give us clues on what to do with the inevitable limitations set on us. After that, we make a commitment to change the situation we are in and to track our growth on a regular basis.

We can sometimes fall flat on our faces and commit social faux pas along the way. If this happens, just remember it’s not the end of the world. We get up, keep moving, and come up with an even better plan. We don’t need to be super heroes to avoid traps. What we need is an interminable spirit to continue on despite mistakes. We have to be our own biggest supporter, the person who cheers the loudest during game time. Otherwise, who will believe in a person who doubts? Let us start chasing our dreams and stop running away from harsh reality.

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The Road Forward towards Self Actualization

Monday, May 25th, 2009

Moving Forward – Moving Up

When people ask us what we’d do if we only had a week to live, we would give so many answers. Most of these answers would center on making ourselves better as a person. We’ll ask for forgiveness, we’ll travel the world, and so on and so forth. But that’s just as far as it goes. We say all these things that we would want to do and give no thought as to how real the question could be.

Then, we find ourselves waking up one day not knowing where we’re exactly headed in life. Our relationships with others require love and respect. Why can’t we give the same to ourselves? We need to know what we’re worth and what we deserve so that we are more driven to do what we’ve always wanted.

To move up in life, to keep a steady growth, we need to follow a few simple rules:

• We have to set goals that are important to us. By setting a goal, we have something to look forward to, a driving force that will fuel or energize us. We need something to sustain our hunger or else we will find everything we do is futile.

• We need to trust in our own abilities. The notion that the grass is always greener in the other side is much like a death sentence. We shouldn’t compare what we have to what others have. All people are different; each of us unique unto ourselves. Don’t mind those people who constantly criticize us. A positive mind is the ticket to a successful journey.

  • Learn the power of meditation. Keeping our souls healthy can be beneficial to both our minds and bodies. By learning to channel our focus to something, we will be able to see things in a clearer light. A cool head does better in solving problems than a hot one.
  • Send those negative thoughts out the door. Negativity has never gotten anyone further. In fact, these thoughts can be our life’s biggest roadblock. Negative thoughts attract negative outcomes. It’s a vicious cycle that we all need to get out of. We all have the ability to get of this rut, raise ourselves up, and begin our journey.
  • Love ourselves. No one loves a person who doesn’t love himself. We need to learn how to be thankful for what we have and who we are. By knowing what we can do and believing in our abilities, we will always have the strength to drive forward.

By knowing what is good in each of us is not being egotistical. We don’t have to brag about it. The glow in our faces will be proof enough of how happy we are with the cards that life has dealt us with. For us to succeed and move up, we have to life free of regrets. Being proud of who we are will prove to be good for our psyche. As long as we live in harmony with ourselves, we are bound to fulfill our destiny.

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Build Your Self Confidence

Friday, May 22nd, 2009

The Power of Confidence

Someone once said that it’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not. Self-trust is what gets you to push your limits and take risks. Of the many secrets to success, self trust and self confidence are foremost. When travelling life’s rough roads, your strength is sometimes put to test. You stumble along the way, get lost, and realize just how many mistakes you’ve made. Each experience serves to enhance your knowledge in life. With new lessons learned, you’re given another set of tools to use for battle.

What will make you a winner is your ability to channel all your energy to fulfilling your goals. There things that you simply cannot control. The outside factors that affect your decisions change, and while you try not to wilt away; you must also face up to your challenges and responsibilities. Blaming others for the repercussions of the decisions that you made is the loser’s way out. Loser. What a horrible term to use, and even worse is when this insult is directed to you. The most important factor to consider is how you’ll react to these changes. In life, there are just some things that are out of our hands. You must have a Plan B for every important decision that you make, or else, a slight change can send your entire structure of cards falling down.

When you do fall down, what will set you apart from all the ordinary people is your ability to get up. The harder you’ll fall, the more you’ll strive. Winners just don’t quit. Even with their sore behinds, they simply get up and take these battle scars along with them as reminders of their courage and tenacity. Success only comes with some sacrifice on your end. Whoever said that becoming successful is easy must have been dreaming because if it were, then we all would have been wildly successful by now. Winners put in more hours than anybody else. If blood, sweat, and tears have to be offered, then you should do it without batting an eyelash. And if you feel that there are just too many forces working against you, you just don’t let these things break your heart. A broken heart is a shortcut to failure.

Another secret to success is to believe in your talent and abilities no matter what everybody else says. No one knows you better, and no one understands you more. It’s all in you, the knowledge and the capacity to surpass the things that hinder you from becoming who you can be. You can’t please everybody all of the time, and some of these people may discourage you to move forward. You need to learn how to channel these voices out and focus on making those who give you support happier.

When you keep these three secrets to success in mind, you can’t help but become the confident person that you should be. You need to know that you can do it. It may not be in the way that you wanted, but the point here is that you can. What sets winners apart from the rest is their ability to dream big and to know that their dreams can happen.

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Finding your Own Shambala

Thursday, May 21st, 2009

When you feel the intensity of a situation and react with anger, you reach your breaking point. You break down, your energy is dissipated, and you become mentally and physically exhausted. Staying upbeat and positive, despite problems, is very difficult to do. You usually end up shifting your focus to the things that pull you down. In the end, you sulk and mope around, wishing that you were elsewhere. If everything you see on TV were real, you simply have to bring yourself to Shamballa, a place of sheer enjoyment and pure pleasure. But what good is this when you know you can’t find this place anywhere on the map? It’s not even in Tibet where the myth started in the first place.

But there is a Shambala. In fact, it’s in every person at this very moment. Getting there, however, is another story altogether. A place of tranquility and peace is inside every person. The paradise mentioned above is a state of mind. If you can learn to better direct your thoughts, you can achieve an energetic state in virtually any situation or circumstances.

An energetic person is one who is always on the go. Despite any difficulties the person is facing, he or she is able to get back up and move on. As you go through a rainbow of experiences, some darker than others, you’ll see yourself stumble along the way. But stumbling isn’t always a bad thing. In fact, this could be your chance to know more about life and understand the many ways things work.

Yoga aficionados also believe in their form of exercise. Many swear by it and say that they are better able to take a step back from the issue and see the bigger picture. Unlike the common belief that exercise tires a person, facts show that it is, in fact, quite the opposite. It can be a way for you to release all your frustrations and have an outlet where you can channel all your anger. There’s a basic explanation behind the power of exercise. After a workout you will be able to see an increase in your serotonin and endorphin levels. These are known as happy hormones in layman’s term. Aerobic activities balance your emotions, calm your nerves, and lower your blood pressure. Try it and see your glow after every thorough workout.

Another strategy is to create your support system, a set of people who will love you and see you through every trial. They will help you stay hopeful and will be your pillar of strength when you are about to collapse. No structure can survive without the proper foundation.

If your energy level reaches the breaking point and you feel just plain tired, it might be time to make some simple changes. No matter what your age, these easy but powerful tips for increasing your energy can really help. You just have to remember that you can always support yourself and adjust your life according to the demands set on you. Coping with problems is a learned skill, but once you will yourself to master this art, you’ll soon find that you are more than ready to meet challenges head on. Happiness is a state of being, and achieving it relies in the power of your mind.
Let your brain be the battery of your life’s energy.

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Learn to De-Stress

Wednesday, May 20th, 2009

In the most stressful of days, everyone needs some for that famous TLC, or what is more commonly known as tender loving care. When you feel like you’re about to jump out of your skin, tear your hair out, and throw yourself out a window, maybe it’s time to mentally remove yourself from the situation and see things in a bigger and better perspective. Stress cannot be avoided, as much as you would like to at all costs. However there are responsibilities you just can’t ignore, and unfortunately, some of these are accompanied by anxiety.

Sometimes giving up just seems to be the best solution. Unfortunately, taking the easy way out is often the worst thing you could do. Yes, you have to learn how to let go, but a lot of things just can’t be solved that way. What do you do when the time comes that you have to deal with everything, face up to your decisions, and take all the consequences? Running away is certainly not an option. This is the coward’s way out. Just remember, being scared is not necessarily a bad thing. It’s what you do when you’re faced with fear that counts. When you successfully deal with bad situations, take the time to treat yourself with a reward. It helps inspire you to do better every time a form of harassment comes into your life.

One thing many people resort to when they need to unwind is have themselves a “spa day.” The term intrinsically assumes the idea of health. Thus, many believe this to be a wisely spent day. A day of relaxation trumps anything that comes next. This is the ultimate way to spoil yourself, a way to reward yourself for all your hard work. Unfortunately, spending the day at a spa can be costly. It only affirms the notion that all good things come at a price. The good news is, this doesn’t have to be the case. As a matter of fact, there are more than hundreds of ways to celebrate your triumphs, many of which require little or no money.

When things become too rough to handle, a walk in the park does wonders. The nice fresh air and the smell of flowers is nature’s version of an energy drink. If the park isn’t your thing, maybe you can call friends and ask them out to a movie. If that still doesn’t cut it, a day spent at the beach should do the trick. The idea is to do the things you love. Rewards aren’t there to tell you to get your wallets out and spend. The idea behind it is to let you feel that you are also worth something and that you deserve the goodness in life because you’ve been a responsible person. Whatever it is that you like, you have to set aside some quality time for it so you are able to see things clearly and in there perspective after you’re refreshed.

A good method to use is to have a list of things you must accomplish in say, 10 years. Include things that are not necessarily related to work. Make it as holistic as possible, bearing in mind that you also need to spend time with those who are close to you on a more personal level. After all, pampering is not a benefit that only some of us should enjoy, it’s everybody’s birthright!

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Better Focus and Concentration

Tuesday, May 19th, 2009

Improving my concentration is one of my focuses this year. For whatever reason, I’m finding it more and more difficult to maintain my concentration. I’ll start a task and wander off mentally within 2 minutes. It’s almost debilitating and certainly annoying. I wind up staying late to finish my work because I’m so unproductive.

Here’s some advice on improving your ability to concentrate and maintain focus on the tasks at hand.

Bruce Lee was once quoted saying that a successful warrior is an average man with laser-like focus. The ability to concentrate is a daunting task, especially if your mind is ridden with worries and distractions.  In fact, studies reveal that a person can listen to something only for so long, which is why speakers are urged to keep their talk short and precise when they can.

Long speeches and talks that ramble nonstop for hours and hours get people fidgety, and in the long run, all they’ll hear is blah, blah, blah, blah. The true message of the speech is lost. In fact, a lousy speaker doesn’t think that less is more. For him, more is, well, what it exactly is, more!

In fact, the poem Humpty Dumpty is a political allegory for the people in power. The question now is, why did he fall from the wall? Could it be that he simply got too bored listening to the speeches of those in power? It wouldn’t come as a surprise if this was, in fact, at all true.

Many people have a hard time concentrating. Can you blame them? Not really. Maintaining focus all throughout the day is very difficult to do. It’s not entirely impossible, but highly improbable. Several factors must be considered when you ask yourself why you just couldn’t see through your work:

  • The noises that surround you
  • Your state of health
  • The level of confidence you have in yourself
  • If your work environment is not conducive
  • The outside factors that force you to direct your attention elsewhere

Today, multi-tasking is a must, especially if you want to succeed in your work.  Unfortunately, there are also more demands placed upon you as the world continues to grow and develop. Focus plays a key role on your way to success. Although there are some things are simply out of your control, you also must work on the aspects that you can easily overcome.

To start with, you have to learn how to remove yourself from all the distractions. A quiet corner and a locked door make a world of difference. Secondly, you must learn to will yourself not to give in to temptations. When you hear the television blaring, don’t see what show is playing at that moment. Remember, work sustains you, not the shows you watch.

You have to learn to push yourself to the limit. If concentrating is just too difficult at the moment, then reward yourself with a few minutes breather. Even top-ranking officials know when to take a break, and so should you. In the end, you have to think about the benefits you’ll reap once you will yourself to move further. No one rewards the lazy, and pitfalls come to those who procrastinate.

Motivating yourself is what gets you to move forward and think of ways to improve the quality of your work. It is when you get to enjoy the fruits of your labor will you realize that good things come to those who try. And to experience these benefits as soon as possible, there is not other resort here but to learn the value of focus and concentration.

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I Know I Can I Know I Can

Tuesday, May 19th, 2009

Here’s a quick introduction to affirmations. Essentially, affirmations are positive self-talks that help us get through moments of self-doubt, keep us on the path we’ve chosen and generally us us “order” what we want from the universe.

Using Positive Self-Talk to Conquer Any Goal

Do you feel like you are always talking yourself out of success? As soon as you start to set goals for yourself, do you suddenly have nagging thoughts about how you aren’t up to the task or how you simply aren’t qualified to carry it through?

If you have ever experienced either situation, you need to change the way you respond to your inner dialogue. Instead of obeying your negative commands, you can use positive self-talk to counter the negativity and overcome nearly all anxious thoughts.

Setting Goals and Sticking to Them with Positive Self-Talk

Are you initially filled with excitement when you first set goals for yourself? Are these thoughts then followed by self-doubt and self-defeating thoughts that stop you in your tracks before you even get started?

It can be difficult to make the most of your life when you are constantly talking yourself out of being a success. It can be frustrating and discouraging to have these thoughts constantly plaguing you. Many of us, in fact, don’t even realize we have them! All we know is that we don’t have the confidence to stick to our plans and reach our goals.

But there’s another way!

Positive self-talk is an effective way to set goals and ensure that you stick to them, even if you have never been able to do this before. The way this works is that you decide what goal is important to you, and then you plan the logistics of how you are going to attain this goal. When self-doubt starts kicking in, you will respond with affirmations that prove your success without surrendering to the negative pressure. Since you’re reading this article, it’s clear that you’re no quitter and you’re certainly not a failure, so start believing in yourself!

Re-Programming Your Mind

Affirmations are essentially positive statements that re-program your mind for the positive. The moment you have a self-defeating thought you’d be able to counter the negative with a motivating statement. An example of a positive affirmation is: “I am worthy of great success,” or “I see myself in the winner’s circle.” What this does is replace negativity with thoughts that will help you move toward your goals instead of further away from them.

Positive self-talk is easier to implement than you might think. You may not be aware of the severity of the negative dialogue currently within your mind. However, once you begin with positive self-talk, you will suddenly realize that you are self-sabotaging the goals you set for yourself from the minute that you make them. This process can open your eyes to exactly how much this inner conversation has been interfering with your life. You’ll feel hopeful that you can now set goals and surpass them.

Through positive self-talk you will be able easily set long and short-term goals for yourself. And when you use affirmations, you’ll have accessible tools to help you push yourself further than ever before. Learning to quiet negativity with positive thoughts is a great move toward setting and attaining future goals with ease.

Stay tuned for much more on affirmations. They are a powerful tool as you will see.

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Keeping a Positive Attitude

Monday, May 18th, 2009

Setting up one’s life so that it’s easier to keep up one’s positive attitude is very important.

Here’s how to develop and keep a positive attitude:

When it comes to your quality of life, attitude is everything!  In fact, it could even be said that whatever you focus on the most, you tend to bring into your life, whether by choice or circumstance.  Have you ever known someone who had a terrible attitude?  Perhaps they were extremely negative and pessimistic and not much fun to be around; or they complained non-stop about how terrible their life was.  Did you find it draining to be in their presence?

A negative attitude will not only make you miserable, but everyone around you too!  

A positive attitude, on the other hand, turns you into a person that everyone wants to be with; a person that constantly experiences great things, and a person who loves their life!  Do you want to be that kind of person?  If so, read on for some easy ways to develop a positive attitude.

1) Do what you love.  This applies to hobbies and fun activities, but it also pertains to one of the biggest parts of your life – your work!  Do you enjoy your job?  Are you spending most of your time on something that makes you feel purposeful and fulfilled?  If not, consider exploring other career options and moving toward a job you’ll love.  When you regularly do things that make you happy, you can’t help but feel better about yourself and your life, which fosters a positive attitude.

2) Expect the best, always.  It’s easy to get into the habit of seeing doom and gloom in every situation, but doing so keeps you forever focused on the negative.  Instead, make a conscious decision to expect the best, even if your first impulse is to think negatively.  Affirm as often as you can, “This is going to work out great!  Wonderful things are going to happen today!”  The more you do it the more you’ll begin to believe it, and the more you’ll begin to experience just that.

3) Build yourself up.  Think and speak positively to and about yourself every day.  Most of us are in the habit of talking down to ourselves, which leaves us feeling hopeless, frustrated and pessimistic.  Get into the habit of building yourself up with positive self-talk and positive thoughts.  Affirm your good qualities and downplay your negative qualities.  Affirm that you are a work in progress; not perfect but great nonetheless!

4) Build others up.  As often as you can, make an effort to encourage, support and compliment the people you encounter each day.  That goes for people you know as well as strangers you meet in your daily travels.  The more you focus on emphasizing the positive in others the more likeable you’re going to be, and the better you’re going to feel about yourself too!

5) Think strength.  The more you worry about your weaknesses and “failures” the more pessimistic and negative you’re going to feel.  Instead, consistently affirm your strengths, talents and capabilities.  You’ll end up feeling empowered and in control of your circumstances, which cannot help but improve your attitude!

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